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Gary Green

Thursday, April 20, 2006 

...When Alex Mooney Broke Pencils With His Ass

From I've Got a Secret, originally airing on GSN, Monday, April 17, 2006
Bil Dwyer: Our next guest is from right here in Los Angeles, California. Please welcome Alex Mooney!

Bil: How are you?
Alex Mooney: Good Bill, how you doing?
Bil: You just moved here from Cleveland?
Alex Mooney: That's right. Cleveland, Ohio.

Bil: Alex, please whisper your secret into my ear and we'll show it to the viewers at home.


Bil: Um, hey panel, I'll give you a clue. Alex has an extremely unique physical talent. And Frank Decaro, we'll start with you.

Frank: Hi Alex! I hear you have a unique physical talent.
Alex Mooney: That's right.
Frank: Is your talent sexual in nature, I hope I hope I hope I hope!
Alex Mooney: No
Frank: No? Well then who cares?

Frank: Does it have to do with being limber?
Alex Mooney: No.
Frank: Is it a feat of strength or something?
Alex Mooney: Yes.
Frank: Strength or endurance?
Alex Mooney: Both.
Frank: Do you lift something?
Alex Mooney: No.
Frank: Are things put on top of you?
Alex Mooney: No.

Frank: Are things put in a... spot?
BUZZER
Frank: Oh thank merciful heavens!
Bil: Billy Bean, over to you.

Billy: So, we have a physical talent. Obviously you use your body to do this. Do you use your hands?
Alex Mooney: Yes.
Billy: Are you consuming anything?
Alex Mooney: No.
Billy: And you're not lifting anything. Do you make a noise with this talent?

Bil: I tell you I'd sure make a noise! Holy Moly!
BUZZER - Over to Jermaine Taylor

Jermaine: So you do this with your body. Do you do this with your teeth?
Alex Mooney: No.
Jermaine: Your nose?
Alex Mooney: No.
Jermaine: Your head?
Alex Mooney: No.

Jermaine: Are you being destructive in some sort of nature?
Alex Mooney: Yes.
Jermaine: Are you breaking something?
Alex Mooney: Yes.
Jermaine: You're beaking something!
Alex Mooney: I'm breaking soemthing!
Jermaine: Okay, so you're breaking something with your body, some unusual part of your body...

Jermaine: Are you breaking something with your boom-boom?
Alex Mooney: Yes!

Jermaine: So I have to guess what it is you break with your boom-booM? 'Cuz I can break a lot of things with my boom-boom!
Alex Mooney: I break a lot of hearts.
BUZZER
Bil: Suzanne...

Suzanne: I have to guess what he breaks with his butt.
Bil: Yes you do.
Suzanne: My mom is so proud right now... is it something made of paper?
Alex Mooney: No
Suzanne: Plastic?
Alex Mooney: No.
Suzanne: Metal? That'd hurt!
Alex Mooney: No

Suzanne: Is it cement or brick?
Alex Mooney: No.
Suzanne: Are you breaking something like a walnut with your butt?
Alex Mooney: No.
Suzanne: Something that we could eat? Well, not right after, I'm thinking. Are you breaking something living? I mean like a tree or a plant.
Alex Mooney: No
BUZZER
Bil: Alex, go ahead and reveal your secret to the panel.
Alex Mooney: I can break pencils with my butt cheeks.

Bil: Now you figured out he was breaking something with his butt cheeks, but we're still gonna give it to him.
Jermaine: How did this come about?
Alex Mooney: When I was fifteen years old, my other brother Dave... we were watching tv, and some lady was bending spoons with her buttocks.
Bil: Go no further. We got it!

Jermaine: So you have a really tight ass it seems.

Frank: Jermaine, he said he could break pencils with his ass, not sharpen them.

Bil: Alright, here's our greatest moment ever. Alex, are you ready to show us how you break pencils?
Alex Mooney: I'm ready.
Bil: With your butt?
Alex Mooney: I'm ready.
Bil: He wore leggings. For tv. Wore some leggings.


Bil: A man's gotta prepare!
Jermaine: Oh my god! Is your mom watching this?
Bil: Here we go! Here we go!



Bil: How about three? Three pencils! I'm worried about splinters. I should have goggles on.
Bil: One... two...
Jermaine: You can do it!
Frank: Don't worry. If you hurt yourself we'll kiss it and make it better!

Bil: Three!


Bil: You okay?
Alex Mooney: I'm good!
Bil: Thanks to Alex for being here. We'll see you next time on I've Got a Secret!

Watch I've Got a Secret... weeknights at 11:30 PM following Match Game on GSN!

i watched monday and tuesday nights and so far it's been fun. frank, suzanne, and jermaine are a riot together. i dig how they interact. i like the other guy too and hope they keep him. he's not funny but will be handy if i need to pee and can't wait for a commercial.

cool that you posted the credits, i watched them for your name but must have missed them.

hope the show's a hit!

Alex Mooney,

What a cute butt and in nylon tights to boot.
I would love to hear from you.
manx98@yahoo.com

Hi, I was out blogging and found your site. It certainly got my attention and interest. I was looking for Photo information and even though this isn't a perfect match I enjoyed your site. Thanks for the read!

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